Family Devotions Help Future Decisions
Devotions for Growing Christians
Family Devotions Help Future Decisions
Deuteronomy 6:4-7 - “Hear, O Israel! The LORD is our God, the LORD is one! And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. And these words, which I am commanding you today, shall be on your heart; and you shall teach them diligently to your sons and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up.”
In today's world, the foundations for good and sound decision-making have been eroded almost to non-existence. Biblical values and absolutes have been systematically removed from public schools and "values clarification" courses now teach our young people to make decisions based on what the individual thinks is the best choice in a situation.
Similarly, many ministries and churches today want to avoid the moral teachings of the harsh "Old Testament God," and teach that personal decisions should be based on what the individual feels is the "most loving" thing to do at the moment. Although vestiges of biblical thinking linger in our culture's subconscious from our Judeo-Christian heritage, the basic framework for personal decision-making in society is not God-oriented, but self-oriented. Young people desperately need parents who are committed to communicating God's values and attitudes, teaching decision-making skills, and helping their children build a strong biblical framework in which life's decisions can be made.
The text above from Deuteronomy 6 is part of the Jewish Shema. The word Shema comes from a transliteration of the first word of Deuteronomy 6:4 - the Hebrew word for "hear." In the Shema, God clearly taught that family biblical teaching was essential under the Old Testament Law. The biblical principle of continual and consistent family teaching is also emphasized in the New Testament. Ephesians 6:4states, "Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger; but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord."
Both the Old and New Testaments emphasize that parents are to teach the Word of God to their children. They are not only to teach what it says, but teach what it means as well. Notice that the emphasis is on teaching by action in both of these Scriptures. A brief word study of Ephesians 6:4 shows that the two words, "nurture and admonition" (KJV) or "discipline and instruction" (NASV) essentially mean "training by act" and "training by word.” Thus biblical family teaching is more than just a short family devotion each day. Family devotions must be a lifestyle. They are to go on all day: "when you lie down and when you rise up" - and in every situation: "when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way."
It’s essential to model biblical doctrine and moral values as an integral part of family life. Too often, Christian parents make decisions that are colored by the selfish actions and thought patterns of the world around us, rather than by God's Word. What good is it to teach children by word, "Go into all the world and preach the gospel," if we teach just the opposite by action by ignoring our neighbors? Will a child learn to be truthful if we say, "You shall not lie," then model the opposite by calling in sick to work to get a day off?
A father who cleans up his neighbor's spilled garbage because the Bible says to "Love your neighbor as yourself," models biblical doctrine for his children. The mother who returns money to the store clerk who undercharged her teaches "You shall not steal" by action. Biblically-based family living now is essential, It’s mandatory for biblically-based decisions in he future.
Deuteronomy 6:7 indicates that appropriate Scriptures should be verbalized when parents model biblical doctrine and moral values. A strong base for future decision-making is built into children's thinking when they see God's ways and hear God's Word at the same time. So "all-day" family devotions should include explanation of biblical values, decisions and actions, along with the appropriate Bible texts. The more children are involved with their parents (and not just observers) in church and neighborhood activities, the more the Scriptures quoted will "stick.”
But practicing biblical "lifestyle family teaching" doesn't mean that families can skip a formal devotional time. From ancient times up to the recent past, fathers and sons generally worked together in the fields or in the family shop. Mothers and daughters spent many hours together preparing food and caring for the home. Evenings were usually spent together. All-day teaching was possible from infancy to young adulthood.
In modern times, however, most families spend much less time together. When the children reach school age, opportunities for all-day teaching become less frequent. As a result, a "formal" family teaching time is even more important today than it was in the past. Unfortunately, precisely because families spend less time together today, this important aspect of family life is a neglected or forgotten tradition. Christian parents need to reverse this trend. We must work hard to preserve the good tradition of "formal" daily family devotions. Day-by-day Bible reading and family prayers will influence the decisions made by every member of the family.
Bible and prayer times should be practical, applicable and easy-to-understand. Reading a brief devotional thought and having a short prayer is better than nothing (much better than nothing!), but we must move on to include teaching doctrine and moral values - especially as children grow older.
Bible stories and the lessons they teach are powerful tools for shaping your’ children’s thinking (and adults as well)! Discussing the sad results of the poor decisions in Samson's life, for example, will help to influence the decision-making process for years to come. The moral and ethical teaching of a passage of Scripture can be thought through and talked through by the entire family. Parents can start a discussion with "What would you do if...?" And family devotions is an excellent time to discuss decisions that the family is currently facing, or decisions that the children will need to make in the future.
Interaction and discussion between parents and children, with time for questions and comments is biblical. This applies to both "formal" and "all-day" family teaching. Deuteronomy 6:20-25 assumes that the children will ask questions and that the parents will give good answers. The old adage of "children should be seen and not heard" is not biblical. Sometimes the innocent comments and questions of children can help parents see areas in their own lives that need some work!
Notice, by the way, that both Deuteronomy 6:4-7 and 6:20-25 stress the fact that the Word of God is first of all to be on the hearts of the parents! How can parents answer their children's questions and pass on biblical doctrine and moral values if they aren't firmly established in God's Word themselves? Powerful teaching occurs when parents are willing to acknowledge poor decisions in the past - or present short-comings - and tell the children that they’re working hard to bring their lives into line with God's Word.
Some of you aren’t parents - yet. Couples can start family devotions for two. Then if the Lord sends children, including them will be an easy transition. Start now with a consistent daily time of Bible reading and prayer, and by living a lifestyle that is in line with biblical doctrine and moral values.
Couples can do "all-day" family devotions by being careful about the TV programs and movies they select now. Then major surgery won’t be needed later as the family grows. Prevention now is better than repairing damage later! If you’re already parents with young children, correct your lifestyle and habits now - before your children are old enough to see through the masks and obvious inconsistencies.
Maybe you’re frustrated because your efforts at a daily devotions have "bombed," and you think that a teaching time just doesn’t work for your family. Try these suggestions.
Be flexible. Think over your family’s lifestyle, and try to find a time when the whole family can be together. Dinnertime is often the only possible time - so flex. Make dinner hours different each day to allow for after-school activities or erratic work schedules. Then make your "formal" family teaching time a habit! Keep the habit going when a parent is out of town or guests are over.
And if dinnertime teaching just doesn’t work out, bedtime may work well.
Choose age-appropriate lessons. Lengthy readings from Leviticus won't keep the children's interest - and if children aren't listening, they won't learn. Bible story books work well for younger children.
Use variety. Why not let the children choose - and even lead - the teaching some of the time? They may choose to create their own visuals, for added effect! Our family has periodic "missionary nights" with a meal from another culture, a discussion of how the religion of that culture differs from the Bible, and a chance to support missions from their allowances. This is action-teaching the Bible! Focus on foreign missions may influence the course of a child's life!
Share prayer requests. Be sure to thank the Lord when the answers come! Encourage children to participate by "sentence prayers" around the table. Be flexible! Adapt! Using the basic guidelines of Bible teaching and practical prayer, Christian parents can be very creative with their family devotions.
One of the greatest benefits of biblical family devotions is that future decision-making for the entire family becomes more biblically based. Biblically-based decisions, even in small matters, become "rule of thumb" for parents and children alike. Major decisions, such as college education, career and job changes, marriage, the selection and use of a home, expensive purchases, and many other decisions will automatically take God and His Word into account, and will be less tainted by the values and attitudes of our culture.
Having biblical family devotions is not an absolute guarantee that children will always make the right decisions in the future. Each child is a growing moral agent, who is responsible before God as an individual. As some children grow to adulthood they may choose to reject their parents’ teachings, and make heart-breaking decisions. But generally speaking, the future decisions of the majority will be greatly helped by good teaching, and the model of parents who regularly practice all-day and formal family devotions.
Inability to make proper decisions was one of the major reasons why God's Old Testament people failed to keep their covenant promises with the LORD. This result was even predicted, if God’s people turned away from their promises. Deuteronomy 28:20,28 says, "The LORD will send upon you curses,confusion, and rebuke, in all you undertake to do...The LORD will smite you with...blindness and bewilderment of heart; and you shall grope at noon, as the blind man gropes in darkness, and you shall not prosper in your ways."
What a vivid description of a lack of ability to make good decisions! And remember - it was significant that parents were to teach God's Word to their children as an important part of the covenant contract. As we follow the history of Israel, we see the sad record and results of bad decisions that were made generation after generation.
God couldn't communicate our responsibility to us more clearly. Families who want their children to make biblical decisions in the future should start living and teaching God's Word today!
- Dave Reid